“You were put on this earth to achieve your greatest self, to live out your purpose, and to do it courageously.”
When it comes to any relationship, it is so important to fully understand it’s dynamic. Like it’s often said, “it’s best to have quality over quantity” and this statement is far more true in relationships. A relationship brings influence, habits, among other things that can truly shape how you think, feel, and exist. So it’s no secret that having bad relationships can affect you in major ways, even leading you to dysfunction outside of that relationship. As a result, your quality of work (whatever that may be) can be affected as well as your self-esteem, views of others and the world, your health, and the list goes on.
While many people may focus on romantic relationships, it is very important to understand the signs of letting go of family ones as well. Often times, we simply deal or settle with family relationships for a number of reasons. However, just like any outside relationship, family members can be just as unhealthy for you and your success overall. Here are some of the signs that I’ve learned to recognize and use as a precursor for making that change:
1. You find yourself unhappy (and/or upset) during or after every conversation with them.
2. They never celebrate your “wins” along with everyone else.
3. They always notice your mistakes and are happy to highlight them, every chance that they get.
4. They never ask you “how you’re doing”, but only talks about themselves.
5. They secretly talk negatively about you and you find out from others.
6. You become wary in trusting others in any relationship, based on your current one.
7. They treat others differently (in a better way) than they treat you.
8. You begin to find it hard to remember any good memories with them.
9. You find it extremely hard to be yourself around them, in fears that the will criticize you.
10. You find yourself less confident in yourself because of what you’ve been told constantly by them about yourself.
While, it’s ok to love someone, despite his or her human flaws, it’s so important to first love yourself and know when something isn’t helping you to become a better person. Love from a distance can sometimes be necessary. Your hope and desire for happiness won’t come solely because you’ve hoped for it. There will be moments in Life when happiness becomes action-based and sometimes that action requires that you let go of unhealthy relationships so that you can be at your best to truly foster and keep good ones.
Perhaps we should love ourselves so fiercely, that when others see us, they know exactly how it should be done. –Rudy Francisco